Week 8 of 52
I have been back and forth on what to write about for week 8. One “new blessing” of the week is an obvious blessing. It was fun, it was light and is something I’m very passionate about. The other was very challenging. It’s something I had never experienced before, so it’s right on brand with what I’m trying to write about, but it was not easy. And, as I’ve learned in my 38 years, challenges bring forth the greatest blessings if you grow through them.
I’ll start with learning about the “Pet Peace of Mind” program. As part of my Hospice volunteering, I elected to help out with the pet program. That is what actually inspired me to start volunteering for Hospice in the first place. I had wanted to find something local where I could help people that aren’t able to care for their pets as they once could. One thing lead to another and I ended up finding a Hospice that also had a pet assistance program for their patients. So, week 8 I had the pleasure of learning all about the program and even signed up for a weekly shift to take care of a patient’s cats. The program’s mission is for volunteer’s to help the pet and patient stay together. As a proud fur mother, I can’t think of much else that warms my heart.
So, now that I’ve written about the obvious blessing, lets get to the challenge that brought forth blessings. Without going into too much detail, my partner and I hosted a party at our home for a family member. Not just any party, actually it was a gender reveal for a new grandchild. My partner and I come from very different backgrounds. He has four kids and two ex-wives, while I have no kids and one ex-husband. His life is very layered and there is alot of history between the ex-wives, children, etc. Everyone was invited to the party at our home. There were 50 people and of those people, were the ex-wives, their mothers and their significant others. Being that I only show up to this life bringing myself and two dogs, I was struggling with the fact of having everyone in my home. I felt out of place, nervous and uncomfortable. I handled some parts maturely and, some parts, not so mature. I had to face it head on. I had to put myself aside and see the greater good, which was the new grandchild. I had to work through my feelings and focus only on what I can control, which was myself. I also failed because I drank a little bit too much bubbly to calm my nerves and ended up a mess towards the end of the night (luckily no ex-wives were there to witness the show). Through that, I learned that calming my nerves with champs, when I am a pressure cooker of emotions, is REALLY REALLY not the wisest. If I’m honest, I’ve repeated this mistake a few times in my life, but I think this time the lesson may actually stick. I do want to say that I actually really like both the ex-wives. They are gracious and nice to me, so the feelings weren’t personally to them. It was the overwhelm of everyone being under my roof that caused the tension within.
There you have it. Week 8 was a doozie (I love that word as you can tell). I think I’m still reeling from that week because here I am writing it a few weeks later. Life is wild and we can only do our best. Sometimes our best doesn’t feel like our best, but we’re all just trying to figure it out. The more we think we have things figured out, is the less we actually know.